EXCUSE ME YOUR LIFE IS WAITING!

Now if the title of this book makes your stomach start to churn, then maybe like me you are British! I don't know why but I can't even read the title without hearing it being said out loud in a really annoying fake American accent. But hold it right there. Put those prejudices aside. This book is superb....... very strange, very challenging and well worth a read.

In summary, it's about putting the feeling into the Law of Attraction. It attempts to give a brief scientific explanation for how this works. The theory is that we are all magnets and are vibrating all the time. Good things are said to vibrate with positive frequencies and bad things with negative frequencies. As like attracts like, if you spend you time thinking about all the things that are wrong about your life, you will vibrate negatively and attract more negative things. On the other hand, if you concentrate on all that is wonderful and really focus on this then your positive vibrations will attract more of what you want.

It is an attempt to explain the synchronicities we all experience from time to time and also the fact that when one thing goes wrong for us, everything else seems to follow. Conversely when things are going well, more good things seem to follow. The idea is to follow the steps set out by Lynn Grabhorn and learn to vibrate positive energy to create a better future. Anything that encourages people to focus on what is good in their life and feel great about it has got to be good, so I though I'd give it a go, in a very small way at first.

At yesterday's Michael Neill/ Robert Holden workshop - see earlier blogs, I returned from the lunchbreak about 5 minutes before the afternoon session was due to start. I'd walked up towards Notting Hill for lunch and had had a cappuccino and a mushroom panini for lunch but had forgotten to buy a bottle of water. I got out my phone to tweet about the workshop and as I did so, imagined how lovely it would be to have a nice cool drink of water. The room was pretty warm and I was almost tasting it and feeling the cool refreshment in the back of my throat. I was shaken from my reverie when a lady three chairs to my right, who I didn't know and hadn't yet spoken to, asked me if I would like to have a bottle of her water as she'd bought two, didn't think she'd drink both and didn't want to have to carry it later! I was a bit gobsmacked to be honest, but said yes, very gratefully. I didn't get her name or get the chance to explain later but if you are reading this and recognise yourself - thank you.

So, coincidence? Maybe. Positive attraction as evidence of The Law of Attraction in action? Who knows. It was a bit odd though and it's given me even more impetus to persist and experiment. Why not join me?

FOLLOW YOUR JOY

Well Saturday's workshop in London proved to have been well worth all the anticipation - it was absolutely wonderful. It was held in Porchester Hall in Paddington and was attended by around 350 people. I had met some of them before and as ever at this sort of event got chatting to a lot of very interesting new people. The atmosphere was warm and friendly and everyone seemed open to sharing and to exploring new ideas.

It was co-hosted by Michael Neill and Robert Holden. I knew that Michael Neill would be fantastic - he always is. I've read all but one of his books and his audio programmes have provided the backdrop to many walks with my dog Sox. Robert Holden on the other hand was relatively new to me - and he was a revelation. Rarely have I been introduced to someone's new material that has made so much sense and struck such a chord with me. He came across as such a straightforward, genuine bloke too with an absolute passion for the work that he is doing. Not only that but he loved sharing it and talking about it.

He shared so many fascinating ideas. One that I particularly liked was the distinction between being what he called HIP and DIP. HIP stands for healthily independent person whilst DIP stands for dysfunctionally independent person. Whilst in many ways it is great to be independent, allowing yourself to ask for and accept help from others is something that we all need to learn how to do and some of us find difficult. Many people are very good at giving help to others but find it hard to take. He spoke about seeing it not as taking but as receiving. I love this distinction and know I will incorporate it into my coaching as well as my own life. There were so many gems like this.

We explored many things during the workshop including the different answers that we received when we asked the same question of our head, heart and gut. Intuitively we know what to do in most situations but often we get in our own way and try too hard to think through the solution. Sometimes we just need to be with ourselves peacefully for a while and allow our inner wisdom to guide us.

Robert was kind enough to chat to me afterwards for a while. His background is in psychology and he has done a lot of work with the NHS around his Happiness Project. I was genuinely touched when he said that he thanked me from the heart for the work I was doing coaching fellow doctors. I told him I loved doing it and that I had found the day inspirational. He signed my copy of his book Success Intelligence with the inscription "Follow your joy".

Thank you Robert ; from my heart, I fully intend to.

ANTICIPATION AND INSPIRATION!

So it's Friday again already and the week seems to have gone really quickly. I'm sat, as I usually am on a Friday morning, in the lounge of my health club, sippping a latte and tapping this out on my laptop. I don't need to get to the surgery quite so early on Fridays so I stop off here on the way in. It means I can take advantage of the free wi-fi here as the ancient browser at the surgery doesn't support the Blogger site.

I'm off up to London tomorrow to a workshop run by one of my very favourite coaches - Michael Neill. those of you who follow this blog will doubtless have heard mention of him before. He is excellent and his coaching approach has really inspired and influenced the way that I coach my own clients. He's a lovely guy too, I met him back in 2009 when I attended a course he was running.

Tomorrow's workshop is co-hosted by Robert Holden, whom I haven't met or heard speak before but I've just started reading one of his books. More of that in a later blog.

Knowing that I was going to this workshop tomorrow has been great as it's given me something to look forward to all week. I'm all for that, I like to set up a constant series of things like that, that I'm really looking forward to. They can be very small things but anticipating them, just knowing that I've got them to look forward to, really adds to my week. In this way I get to enjoy them all not once but three times:
   Once - when I'm looking forward to them - really visualising how it's going to be.
   Second time - when I'm there, really enjoying it in the present.
   Thirdly, afterwards; looking back, reflecting on what I most enjoyed, what I learned,who I met etc.

I'm still in touch with three of the people I met on the 2009 course and continue to be inspired by their work too. Coaching has taught me many things and one of the most important has been to be open to new experiences. Doctors in general tend to hold quite fixed views about certain areas and perhaps aren't quite as willing and open as some groups of people to listen to new concepts, new ways of thinking. Maybe it's the scientific background, I don't know, but with this in mind I'll be telling you next week all about the book I'm currently just finishing as it certain fits into the category of challenging conventional views of life!

So have a great weekend. Enjoy all that you have and keep your eye out for inspiration - it's all around you once you start to look.

SO FAR SO GOOD....

On Monday we introduced a new appointment system in my practice, which seems to be working very well. I designed the new scheme which involves a radical shift in the balance between appointments that can be booked in advance and those bookable on the day as emergencies. The latter has got to be one of the most overused words in the english language, at least where I practise. I've been here for nearly 22 years now, if you include my time as a registrar and the number of true emergencies I have seen even in all that time is pretty small. Other favourite local phrases include "he turned around and said" (often used repeatedly within a short time - must be getting dizzy by now I always think to myself) and "she was rushed to hospital" (no-one ever just goes to hospital do they, they're always rushed there?)

Anyway, I digress; as with any change, there were a lot of obstacles, or as us coaches like to call them - challenges! Many of these centred around communication and making sure that everyone understood what we were doing and what they should and shouldn't be saying. The reception team are doing really well, even though it's been made more complicated for them in that the new system currently only applies in the mornings and the afternoons run as before (another challenge!). I think this will change when we review it in a couple of weeks.

So so far so good but I'm not in the surgery to monitor it today as I'm off up to BMA House for a musculoskeletal masterclass. I'm looking forward to that and it'll be nice for once to be in the audience; last time I was up in London for a masterclass I was the one up on the stage, teaching NLP to 150 people. I reckon it will be a lot more relaxing today and looks like a good programme.

I always feel a bit guilty when I go to these sort of talks as when you get chatting to someone they are inevitably from the Outer Hebrides and have had a three day barefoot trek across the wilderness to reach the nearest ferry then had to take six trains, fourteen buses and a taxi. They are usually carrying an enormous rucksack as well as they've needed supplies and several changes of clothes. When they ask where am I from I guiltily mutter - "oh just outside Watford, 15 minutes away by train." You get that sort of pitying look of "aye yay don't know what suffering is lassie....." before you get the chance to follow up with a rather weak sounding - "so did you enjoy the morning session?" It's usually about then you realise they're the next speaker....

I'll stop there as I need to head for the station. My good intentions of walking there (20 minutes) have gone out of the window as it is chucking it down outside here - so much for the drought. Whatever you're up to - enjoy your day.

DECISIONS

How do you make decisions? Let me be more specific - how do you know when you've made the right decision? We all make decisions in our own individual ways - some weigh up all the evidence, others make a more snap judgement. What interests me is what internal gauge do we use to know that what we've decided is right for us? The language that we use to talk to ourselves in is important here. Do you ask yourself - does this look right to me? Maybe you ask yourself does this sound right?. Others, and this includes me, will ask themselves this question - does it feel right?

It doesn't matter which way you do it, all are equally valid, what matters is being able to recognise your own yes signal. Once you know what yes means for you, you can be really confident in your decisions.

I've had a big decision to make in the last week. I considered all the pros and cons but in my heart of hearts I think I always knew which way it was going to go. When I thought about carrying on as I was, I felt weighed down and somehow not authentic. However, when I thought about following the other path and making the change I was considering, everything just felt right.

Maybe you've got a decision to make, or you're wondering is this the right way for you to be going. Think about how you've assessed your decisions in the past, what has worked for you before? Chances are it will work for you again. Another technique is to think about flipping a coin between two alternatives. Just before the imaginary coin toss, stop and ask yourself which way do you hope it's going to land. Might be more revealing than you think.

INTERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE HAPPY MIND

I don't know about you but I woke up this morning to bright sunshine streaming into the room - wonderful. There is something about a sunny day that makes everyone feel so good isn't there? OK I know it's forecast to rain later but who cares - I guess we need it anyway. Certainly in the surgery patients are noticeably happier on a sunny day.

Great as that is, why wait? Why let your happiness be determined by the weather or indeed by any external factors at all. Why not just decide to be happy?

You see I believe that happiness starts from the inside and begins with a decision; a decision to start being happy right now. Michael Neill, coach and author of several great books, once said "When you are happy, nothing changes but everything is different" and I think that is so very true.

When you are happy you smile and that alone makes you feel good. If you don't believe me then just try it. Not only will it make you feel better but it makes other people behave differently to you. They respond warmly, they smile back, they talk to you. This further reinforces those good feelings.

So yes it's Friday, yes it's the weekend, yes it's sunny - all great reasons to be happy in themselves and I know you've got many many more of your own too, but my message today is don't let what's happening out there determine how you feel inside. Take a positive decision right now to be happy, from this moment on and just see what happens. I guarantee you'll be glad you did.

Have a wonderful, fun-packed inspired weekend and I'll see you on Monday.

MOTIVATION - DON'T WAIT JUST DO IT!

This weekend will see 25,000 or so people from all across the world converge on the streets of London to run the London Marathon. It's a wonderful day, I know because I ran it myself in 2005. I ran in aid of the spinal injury charity Aspire and raised over £ 4500. Pleased as I was with the fundraising, the real winner that day was me. I learned a lot about myself during the training and the race, lessons that have served me well ever since.

As a GP I often hear my patients say that they would love to do something eg. stop smoking, lose weight or start to exercise, but they don't have any motivation. If I know them well or I've feeling mischievous, I stop and hunt around in my desk drawer for a while before saying - sorry I don't seem to have any in here for you today, I'm fresh out of it! That usually makes them laugh or at least smile. I haven't yet had my face slapped but there's always a first time.

My point is that motivation is not a thing, it's a concept. In NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) it is what is referred to as a nominalisation. Think of this as something you can't put in a wheelbarrow. So if it's not a physical thing, maybe it's something you don't need? At least not initially.

Back to the marathon. Although I played fairly regular sport, at the time I started to train for the marathon I was most definitely not a runner. An April marathon involves doing most of the long, hard miles in the winter and I trained very early in the morning. If I'm honest I didn't often wake up and think yes, it's blowing a gale out there, let me out there into that horizontal sleet! What I can say though is that once I'd got myself out of the door and a few yards down the road I always felt better for it - and then I loved it.

You don't need to wait for motivation to come before you start something. As they say on the Nike ads - Just do it, the motivation will follow.

Knowing this opens up vast new possibilities of achievement. Just start and see what happens. If you start and really don't enjoy it, then maybe it isn't the right goal for you - more of that in a later blog. My bet (and I did have the winner in the Grand National last week) is that once you've started you'll develop momentum. Do something a few times and you develop a habit. Once good stuff has become a habit then you are bound to achieve great things. It doesn't matter how small your steps are - as long as you are going in the right direction you will get to where you want to go.

So to recap:

      Motivation is not a thing.
      You don't need it to get started.
      Once you are under way motivation will follow.
      You'll develop momentum and be on your way to your goal!

So as you watch those runners plod along, spare a thought for what they've been through. Maybe running a marathon doesn't float your boat but take inspiration from them and use it to create something wonderful in your own life.

INSPIRE A GENERATION

I was fascinated by today's news story about the choice of motto for the London Olympics, now just 100 days away - "Inspire a generation." I listened to a discussion about it on Radio 5 this morning and was amazed by some of the comments. People seemed all too quick to moan about it, mostly stating that it is far too big a statement and overly-ambitious.

Well that's the point isn't it? Do we really want to publisise our nation with a motto along the lines of,

"A fortnight of running races that might get a few people into sport for a bit."
or
"A glorified sports day at the tax payers expense."

No, no and a thousand times no!

Mottos like this are all about huge ideals, about massive goals and tremendous achievement.
They've got to be big, they've got to be bold and they've got to really appeal to your heart.
The thought of inspiring a generation makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck and gives me goose pimples - in the right way. It's the same way I feel when I remember David Beckham's free-kick goal against Greece that put England into the World Cup finals. It makes me proud, it makes me want to stand up and be counted and above all it makes me want to take action. After all isn't that what any motto or goal is supposed to do?

We are all motivated by what Anthony Robbins calls big juicy goals. The things we really care about, not the small mundane stuff. I wouldn't be motivated to get up at 5:30am and go and do a commuter surgery in the practice if I did it just to pay my bills. No. What gets me up in the morning is the knowledge that I am making a difference to peoples' lives - every day. I'm lucky to get the chance to do that multiple times every day but whatever we do we can all do this in some way. Whether that's with a smile or a word or just a small random act of kindness.

So if like me you're excited by the thought of inspiring a generation, let's say so. Let's do something about it. Let's lead by example. If you want to change the world, begin with yourself. As Gandhi once said, "my life is my message." Make sure it's a message that you are proud for others to see, hear and feel.

I recently read Jonny Wilkinson's excellent autobiography - it's superb. One of the goals he aspires to is always be able to sign off a 24 hour video recording of his life, thereby always being happy about and proud of his actions. Now here's a man who takes being a role model very seriously but we can all learn from this. Become a role model for those around you - your kids, your friends, your colleagues. Make yourself proud, make them proud and "Inspire a generation!"

NEW WEEK, NEW START, NO LIMITS

The last year or so has been really exciting. As well as continuing to work as a part-time GP I've been working hard to establish my NLP Training business, NLP4MEDICS. I love doing this but it has meant I've spent less time doing the thing I really love doing and that is individual coaching. That is all about to change.

Whilst I've continued to coach during this last year I've only taken on a small handful of clients. We've had some excellent results working together. Coaching never feels like work, it feels like a privilege and an opportunity for me to learn from some amazing, inspirational people. The thought of doing more of this fills me with energy, joy and excitement.

Coaching is wonderful. It's an opportunity to achieve things you didn't think you were capable of achieving. With the help of a coach you will not only reach your potential but often far exceed it.

"The only limits in our life are those we impose on ourselves."
Bob Proctor

The limits are coming off and I'm ready for anything. I'm going to be using this blog to explore resources and concepts that have helped me in my personal journey. I've found them really inspirational and exciting and I hope you will too.

So if you're thinking about coaching or just want to share ideas and thoughts then you're in the right place. Why not sign up for regular updates and share this page with your friends?