TAKE TIME OUT FOR YOURSELF

Have you ever made great plans to get things done and then somehow found that things just didn't work out? Did other things get in the way? Did you let them get in the way?

Sometimes, to achieve what you really want to - you need to put yourself first. In our culture, this is often seen as selfish..... but think of it like this, if you don't look after yourself, who else is going to? What good will a burnt-out you be to your family, your friends.... let alone to you?

Think about being on a plane. Once you've been shown where the emergency exits are and how to do up a seat-belt (can there be anyone left on the planet who doesn't know how to do that?), next it's the bit about the oxygen masks. We are told that if travelling with children, to put our own mask on before theirs - for the very same reason. If you can't breathe what good are you going to be at helping them?

How often do we do this though in our everyday lives?
How often do we set aside a few minutes just for ourselves...... to be.... whatever we want to be and do whatever we want to do? Why not try it, not just today but on a regular basis. Try and get into the habit of setting aside a regular bit of time just for yourself. Maybe to do an activity that you really enjoy, or maybe just for a bit of quiet "me time".

You'll soon notice the benefits, believe me. When now is a good time to start?

STOP TRYING & START ALLOWING.

Inspiration......Think about the best decisions you've ever made....

Have you ever struggled to make your mind up about something or struggled to work something out..... only to find that the answer just came to you when you weren't even trying to find it? That's what I mean by inspiration. 

How did it happen? What changed when you stopped trying to force the solution? Maybe something else took over, some other part of you, or some higher power? How did the answer get through to you? Ever thought that maybe it was there all along and that when you stopped trying to force it and just allowed it to bubble up..... there it was.

How often have you decided to sleep on it or go out for a walk before deciding something, or when stuck with a project? This does more than just change your environment for a while, it disengages your conscious mind and let's your unconscious mind (the clever bit) take over.

Most of us spend our days just using our conscious minds, deliberately thinking our way though life. So much of our brain power goes untapped when we do this as we literally block our unconscious mind from guiding us to the right solution.

So next time you are struggling with a decision, stopped trying to force a solution. Take a step back, listen to what your unconscious mind is telling you and allow the answer to come through to you.

Sometimes life can seem hard enough. Any excuse to try less hard has got to be worth a go!

MAKE IT EASY - USE YOUR VALUES

There's an easy way and a hard way to do everything....... so why not choose to make it easy for yourself? Learning to use your values is one such way.

Values are the things that are really important to us, the real bottom- line things that we stand for. As a coach, values elicitation is a really valuable exercise to do with a client. People are often surprised at what is most important to them - when someone really pushes them to focus in and decide.

Once you know your values, you can combine them and use fulfillment in one area to help you in another. Let me explain.....

As a doctor, you'll probably not be surprised to hear that health is one of my highest values. Striving for wellness and all that that involves is very important to me. I adore training in the gym, but those who know me know that I'm not exactly a great athlete! Yes, I once ran the London Marathon but I don't think Paula Radcliffe lost much sleep over my time....

Anyway, I love it and I know it's important for me but everyone needs something to help keep them on track when the going gets tough. It's always easier not to.......

I'm also a huge fan of personal growth and self-improvement. I love reading and listening to the work of those who really inspire me. I find that listening to my I-pod whilst cycling or on the treadmill, playing Anthony Robbins, Joe Vitale, Jay Abrahams etc. really fires me up as I train.
The time flies by, the physical effort seems much less and I've stretched my mind as well as my body. This simple tip might help you too.

Wellness is all about balance. Take a good look at what you are trying to achieve and think how you can make it easier for yourself. When now is a good time to start?

STOP COMPLAINING AND SET AN INTENTION INSTEAD

Regular readers will know of my love of sport. I signed in to write this blog with the intention of basking in the sheer wonderfulness of a winning return to the football season at Watford and a truly fabulous day for Great Britain at the Olympics....... I'll keep that for another day though because as I did so, an email came in that made me stop and think.

I subscribe to Joe Vitale's blog. You may know him from the film The Secret and his site at www.mrfire.com is worth checking out. Today's email from Joe was about complaining and intentions. It urged people who are about to make a complaint, to stop for a minute and turn that complaint into an intention. What a better place the world would be if we could all do that.

Just try it. Here's what I mean. Next time someone cuts you up on the road, don't waste your time yelling at them - they won't hear you and it probably won't help you feel any better (OK, maybe a tiny bit, but it won't last!). Instead, set yourself the intention of being more courteous to other drivers during the rest of the journey. What have you got to lose and who knows, you might even enjoy it.

Oh, and did I tell you that Watford won.......!

ASK YOURSELF BETTER QUESTIONS

Which parts of your body can you feel an ache or pain in right now?......
How did that question make you feel? I bet it made you stop, focus on your body and notice niggly little things that you'd barely noticed before. Am I right?

Contrast that to - What is the most peaceful time you can remember?
I bet that gave you a completely different feeling didn't it.?

Answering the question forces you to relive the experience. In the first example, not only did you have to actively seek out the aches and pains but you felt them too. In the second one, just by thinking about that beautiful, peaceful time..... you were back there. Your breathing slowed and got deeper, your blood pressure fell slightly and the pressures of your day seemed to ease away somehow.

What was the difference? You didn't change. You were still sat there in front of your screen. You just asked yourself a better question.

If you ask yourself a better question - you get a better answer.

Anthony Robbins loves this technique. He advocates choosing five great questions to ask yourself first thing in the morning. Answering these makes you relive the good feelings associated with them and gets you into a great state of mind for the day ahead. Try it...... whay have you got to lose?

WHY WAIT?

After almost 20 years as a doctor, I'm still amazed by how differently people react to illness. In a typical week I see lots of peole with minor illnesses - coughs, colds, sore throats. Most people see the few days that they are sick as a minor inconvenience and just get on with their life, whilst for others, the illness seems to become their life. They spend their time ruminating on how poorly they feel, tell everyone about it and seem to enjoy comparing their symptoms with those around them.

Contrast this with my terminally ill patients, or the housebound elderly who are forced to depend on others for help in a way they never imagined. Many of these are incredibly positive in their outlook. When I talk to them about this, they'll often say something like - "now I know I haven't got that long left, I really try and make the most of what I do have." They are able to find pleasure in small things - a sunny morning, beautiful flowers, a warm smile. Often their situation helps them focus in and appreciate what they have right now. They are a pleasure to spend time with and I always learn a lot from them.

Hopefully as you read this, you're in good health...... so why wait to start appreciating what's around you? I believe that when you feel good, you start to look out for other good things around you. In other words - you get more of what you feel.

One way to kick start this is to ask yourself better questions - more of this tomorrow.

APPRECIATE WHAT YOU ALREADY HAVE

"You prove to me that there is a God and I'll come to mass!" announced my son this morning as we were getting ready. It was an attempt to be allowed to stay at home and watch the Olympics. As regular readers will know, I love sport and I adore the Olympics, but he wasn't going to get round me that easily....

"OK then", I said, "can you prove to me that there isn't a God? Who do you think is responsible for all the wonderful things in your life?" His initial blank look (think of Harry Enfield's Kevin character) was soon replaced by a more thoughtful one. I asked him how he thought he got his good health, ("yeah"), his food, ("whatever"), his home,("money"), his family, (no reply), his friends, (struggling now),his education, his opportunities? For once he said nothing.

I told him that it doesn't have to be about God in a formal sense. It's about the acknowledgement of the presence of a higher power - does it matter what you call it? I see attendance at a place of worship as a time of quiet reflection and a chance to say thank you for all that is great in your life. We have so many blessings. He got dressed without another word.

Just stop reading this for a second and think on this.....
I bet that wherever you are, you are warm enough and that you've eaten and drunk pretty recently. You are probably well clothed and the fact that you are reading this at all is testimony to that fact that you have internet access and the education to make that reading possible. That immediately puts you far ahead of a huge proportion of our world.

It's easy to forget as we dash about our busy lives, that we have so much to be gratfeul for. I think Socrates had it right when he said,
"He who is not contented with what he has, will not be contented with what he would like to have."

By all means aim for something better, but never forget to appreciate all that is already yours.