MAKING A DIFFERENCE

One of the best ways I know of feeling great is by helping others.
There is something incredibly satisfying about doing something kind for somebody else - for no reason at all. If you don't believe me, try it for yourself!

I've been very lucky in the last few months to become involved with a fantastic organisation called the Women in Business network www.wibn.co.uk They are set up to help and support women working across a diverse range of professions. The atmosphere within the group is wonderful. I have met some superb people and have learned an awful lot, both personally and professionally from their company.

It's a two way thing of course, the more you put into it the more you get out. I never fail to be amazed at the incredible generosity of spirit of many of the women I have met. A few of us are planning a fundraising event soon - trying to give something back in our own small way. We're getting a real buzz out of it.

For many people this can be a difficult time of year, long dark evenings etc. My advice is give yourself something to focus on. Getting involved in a fundraising project of your own or with friends is a great way to do this. You'll love it and believe me the benefits of it will go far beyond the money you raise. Contribution is an area that is sometimes overlooked but it's an important one. Why not start thinking about how you can make a difference today?

BELIEVE !

It's been a busy week across the pond in the United States of America - with Barak Obama being inaugurated, twice...... and could you believe they couldn't find a bible in The White House to do the second swearing in!

Anyway - the incoming new president seems to bring with him a huge new wave of hope and expectation. The dreams of millions of his fellow countrymen seem to be resting on his shoulders. I read an interesting comment about this during the week, I can't remember where, but I thought I'd share it with you.

When surveyed, an enormous majority of Americans said they believed in Barak Obama and had faith that he could turn things around for their nation. Now we can be pretty sure that most of those have never met him personally - although I'm sure he is incredibly charismatic - but my point is this. Without having met him, they were all so willing to believe in him - but what will it take for them to believe in themselves?

I think that self-belief is one of the most vital tools we have for surviving and thriving in the world. If I could give my kids one thing only - it would be self-belief. If I could have a second one it would be enthusiasm.

If you start to believe in yourself then others will too and nothing is more powerful at re-inforcing one's own positive thoughts than this. self-belief really is the cornerstone to success. Any type of success comes from first knowing that you are capable of achieving it - and then just getting out there and doing it!

DON'T LET THEM GRIND YOU DOWN!

According to the "experts", whoever they may be, today is officially the most depressing day of the year. The day by which most people have given up on their New Year resolutions and realised how much debt they are in after Christmas. That coupled with the cold weather and long dark nights is supposed to make us feel worse today than on any other day.

Not in my house!

Now admittedly we've had a birthday in our house today. One of my sons is 13. I am now the mother of a teenager - maybe that should be depressing.... but no!

Why do the media bother with stories like this? How do they make most people feel? I doubt I'm in the majority by laughing and saying "ooh I don't think so." Another example of how the media try to manipulate and control us. 

As I've said in an earlier blog, I now don't watch the news last thing at night. I don't want my nocturnal peace invaded by Robert Peston's brand of economic gloom and doom. I firmly believe you get more of what you focus on. If you spend your time being told that the world is a dreadful place then that's how you'll start to feel. More than that, you'll look out for all the things out there that back this up - and ignore all evidence to the contrary.

It's the same with your mood. Focus on what is great in your life at the moment. It might be something really small. You might have to think for a while to find it..... but there'll be something. Be grateful for and appreciate all that we do have.

We live in a world with many advantages. Most of us enjoy good health. We have access to sanitation and clean running water. Education is available and communication and travel have never been easier - the world really is becoming a smaller place. There is so much for us to be grateful for and to appreciate. 

So next time someone tells you something that is designed to bring you down - refuse to feel that way. Norman Vincent-Peale, the father of positive thinking said:

"Change your thoughts and you change your world".

Think great thoughts, appreciate all that you have and enjoy your life.

Remember - being happy is a positive decision. Now would be a great time to start!

If you'd like to discuss having some coaching sessions with me, then visit my homepage:

www.change-it-lifecoaching.co.uk

BE GOOD TO YOURSELF

Many of my clients describe to me the feeling of being "overwhelmed".
Modern life seems to lead to many people feeling as if there is always too much to do and too little time. The feeling of pressure seems unrelenting and leaves a sense of never really doing anything well enough. Sound familiar?

When faced with such a feeling I encourage my clients to take a step back and really look after themselves. It's what Cheryl Richardson refers to in one of her books as "extreme self care".
Looking after yourself as well as you can means a fitter, healthier and happier you - much more able to help and support others and generally a much nicer person to be around.

How can this be achieved though, when there is always so much else to do?

I encourage my clients to take some "me time" - regular, definite, well-defined blocks of time that can be used purely for you. Cross that time out in your diary and really look forward to it. Work a bit harder, or preferable a bit smarter either side of it - but keep it free at all costs. When it comes round - turn off you phone, computer, blackberry - whatever...... and just do whatever it is that you really enjoy. Recharging your batteries in this way on a regular basis will really pay off. Believe it or not, the world will survive if you don't reply to your emails for a few hours! When you come back, you'll feel refreshed, re-energised and ready to take on the world.

It can sometimes feel as if you are trying to do too much. That's why I love this quote from Scott Sorrell so much:

"You make the world a better place, by making yourself a better person".

If you want to see something change for the better - start by changing yourself. Go for it! When now is a good time to take that first step?

YOU OWE IT TO YOURSELF

How are you getting on with those New Year's resolutions?
Hopefully you are still on track with your goals and really enjoying the process as well.
The aim of making changes is not only to achieve the desired outcome but to enjoy the journey too. For example - if getting fit was on the agenda for you and trips to the gym are one of your ways of achieving this, the aim is to make your gym visits as much a part of your life as say.... brushing your teeth. It's part of the new you.

If things aren't working out so well - all is not lost!
Don't give up if you've had the odd chocolate or "forgotten" to walk the dog on the odd occasion. The main thing is to recognise it, to acknowledge it and to move on.
OK so you might have slipped up today but tomorrow is another day entirely and you are still on track for your ultimate goal.

Remember - everything you do either takes you closer to your goal, or it doesn't.
If you keep taking steps towards your goals - however small they may be - you are going to get there! The main thing is to keep focussed.

Keep reviewing your progress too. I like to write down the progress I have made in a success journal. I spend 5 or 10 minutes in the evening, looking back at the day and noting down the positive steps I have taken towards my goals. Try it - it's really motivating.

If you are struggling or want some extra support along the way then why not hire a coach?
A coach is always there for you, is on your side and ready to stretch and challenge you. They can support you and keep you going when times get tough.

Remember the airline analogy. In an emergency, when the oxygen mask drops, you put your own one on before helping others to do the same. The better shape you are in - mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally - the better you'll be able to help and support those around you. Taking some "me time" - what Cheryl Richardson, the american coach, calls "extreme self -care"- is what many of us need to do right now.

Why not visit my website http://www.change-it-lifecoaching.co.uk/ or email me on michelle@change-it-lifecoaching.com to discuss how we can work together. What better investment could you make in yourself this year?

SPREAD THE LOVE

Yesterday's blog was all about feeling good. I talked about how you can make your goals even more attractive to your subconscious mind by creating a really vivid picture for yourself of your goal having already been achieved. Did you do it? How great did it make you feel? I referred to this in a previous blog as "Nevillizing" your goal - after Neville Goddard who first described this.

Before we can achieve any lasting change we need to get ourselves into the right state of mind. This mental rehearsal is vital. Thinking about how great something will feel once it is achieved is a huge step towards actually doing it. If you really want it, your subconscious will help you find a way to get it.

It's a great habit to develop to mentally rehearse something that you want to make happen. Once you get yourself into that great state it is so much easier to actually accomplish it.

Letting others know what you are trying to achieve also works really well too. Sharing your goals with those close to you can really help fire you on to achieve them. You know that other people will be looking out for you and checking up on you, in a supportive, non-critical way.

Why not let other people know what you want to achieve in 2009? Share that great feeling of determination and inspiration with others. You could start by sharing this blog with your friends and family. Since I started it, this blog has been read in about 15 countries and about 6 states of the USA. If you enjoy it - tell your friends about it. Why not send it to them using the link below?

Look at it this way. If you and I both have an apple and we exchange apples.......we've still got one apple each. If we each have an inspiring idea and we exchange ideas....... we've now got TWO ideas each. Ideas, love and inspiration really do make the world go round. How good will you feel to know that not only have you benefited from reading this but that you've passed it on to others too? Spread the love.

HOW GOOD DOES THAT FEEL?

How are you getting on with those New Year's resolutions?
Hopefully you're still on track. The important thing to remember is, if you slip for a day and maybe sneak a few chocolates when you said you weren't going to - don't give up! Don't think, oh well, I've blown it now..... See it as a temporary lapse and move on.

One technique that really helps to make your goals so much more worth chasing is to visualise that you are already there. Take out a piece of paper - it's not good enough just to think it, you have to actually write it - and imagine that you already have the thing that you are aiming for. For example - I am learning to speak french. My goal is to speak french fluently. I might write something along the lines of - I am sitting at the table of the cafe in the beautiful hill town in Provence. The sun is beautifully warm on my back. I am sipping an espresso whilst reading Le Monde and chatting effortlessly with the locals. Afterwards I pick up my bread, cheese and olives and walk back along the winding lane to my cottage......

Oooh, I enjoyed that...... actually I'm between patients in my evening surgery at my sub-urban general practice. In reality it's pitch black and freezing outside but thinking and writing like this makes me really want to pursue my goal even more than before. Did you notice that I wrote in the first person and added lots of detail. This was just the start of it but do you get the idea?

Try it now - I guarantee you'll feel great, not only whilst you're doing it but every time you re-read it too. When now is a good time to get started?

GREAT EXPECTATIONS

How did you start your day off today?

Before you answer that, I'm referring to how you started it mentally - I'm not looking for the details of your bathroom routine..... as my kids would say "TMI" (which for anyone older than 15 and not a parent of teenagers = too much information!)

Did you wake up expecting a great day or did you open your eyes, hear the latest credit crunch news on the radio and wish you hadn't bothered? In general do you expect things to go well for you or is do you find it easier to keep your head down and expect nothing - so you're never disappointed? The problem is with the latter approach - you're rarely excited either! 

There is great evidence to suggest that you get more of what you focus on. If you hop out of bed with a smile on your face and anticipate that your day will go fantastically, you're far more likely to notice the really good things going on - things that are going on around you all the time that you don't otherwise notice. 

Try this. Stop reading for 30 seconds and look around the room you are in and mentally note all the blue things you can see............ have you done it?...................OK now try and recall all the brown things in the room? Hang on..... yes I did change the colour the second time! My point is, you probably only noticed what you were looking for. Look for the happiness around you - there's more it about than you realised.

Whatever is going on in the world, at some level, you have a choice. You can let the doom and gloom get to you or you can choose to rise above it. Choose to appreciate what is positive in your life and begin to make yourself someone that others look to for inspiration.

Being happy is a positive decision - take it for yourself today!

TIME - YOUR MOST PRECIOUS COMMODITY

How often do you say to yourself, "I don't have enough time to......"

It is certainly something I hear from just about every one of my clients.

Do you ever look at other people and think to yourself, "oh it's easy for them, they have so much more time than I do?"

But do they.......?

Do they have more than 24 hours in their day?

More than seven days in their week?

Or have they just learned to use their time more effectively?

Of course the latter is true - and the good news is, if they can learn to do so.... then so can you!

In an earlier post I talked about keeping an activity log, a really useful exercise. Try it if you haven't already done so. Divide your day into 15 minute slots and write down everything you do within that time period - and I mean everything. If you spend 10 minutes looking out of the window daydreaming - include that too. At the end of the period - at least 3 days, a week is even better, add up the time you have spent doing each activity. You'll find it quite revealing!

Knowing what you do with your time is a great start as once you've got this knowledge you can go on to use it more wisely. An excellent way to do this is to get into the habit of using to-do lists. People who plan ahead for each day are much more productive. It's a great discipline to sit down for 10 minutes during the evening and think about what you need to do the following day. Actually write it down, don't just think about it. Use your mobile phone and set reminders for certain tasks if that helps you. That's certainly good for phone call reminders - it's hard not to call someone when an alarm goes off with the invitation to make that call now at the touch of a button.

It is also really satisfying to tick off items on the list as you accomplish them. 

Why not use an A and a B list?

The A list is for tasks that absolutely must be done that day, the B list is for things that should be done but aren't of such a high priority. Remember to do the A list tasks first. Then tackle the B list. Find a way of rewarding yourself when you complete each list.

Spending a few minutes on a Sunday evening planning the week ahead is another excellent habit to develop. Once you get into this you'll find yourself working on lists for the month ahead and thinking into the even longer term. Believe me, the few minutes it takes to prepare in this way will save you hours and make you so much more time efficient.

All you'll have to do then is decide what you're going to do with all that time you save......

Now that's the sort of dilemma we all like!